Hello,

I am Gojira.

I'm not a saint.

I look like one. I act like one in front of the rents. I even smell like one (whatever. Like you know what a saint smells like) Just take my word for it.

I'm actually the Devil...If the Devil brags to be a six foot chick who has recently mastered the art of applying lipstick while playing PS2 games

Believe me. You'll think I'm the Devil when I tear your favourite moving picture to pieces and knaw on its shriveled husk like film jerky.

I am a film expert.

Heh. But only in the sense that if you don't agree with what I say about a particular film and you want to argue or respond...I AM ALWAYS GOING TO WIN.

This is not a challenge. I am not throwing down a film-geek gauntlet for you to disprove my rants...

I am stating a fact because in my world... the word "expert" does not constitute how many years I slaved over a hot VCR (pre DVD) or how many movies I have sitting on my shelves (By the way...uhm...THOUSANDS) Or even how many actually movies I have had the (cough) honor of working on....

In Gojiraland...I am the expert because I DON'T CARE what other people think. I tell the truth. I don't listen to critics or follow the main stream. On a good day I might say that Titanic was the best film ever set to celluloid...(cough)or that Dreamcatcher was horrendously overlooked for this year's Oscar for best film...On a bad one...your favourite movies goes down in flames... It's hard to say.

I'm unpredictable.

I'm all about the guilty pleasure.

I am all-encompassing Evil with the capital E...

Which should set you to thinking: "Would Evil actually tell me it's Evil...or would it tell me it's Evil so that I think it's trying to make me think that it ISN'T Evil and then it ends up devouring my soul...thus proving that it IS Evil and I should have known when it came right out and told me so...that's so....EVIL!"



Now...I am off to search the stacks for Film #1